Why do I write?

Just like with anything, you might find yourself (and others) asking where this all started. Well, if you asked me ten years ago where me writing all started, I’d claim I’d never seriously thought about writing–and I’d be telling you my truth too, because when I felt prompted by the Lord to start writing in 2012 it seemed absurd, and like it came out of nowhere.

In 2012, I was having every door slammed in my face professionally. I’d hit a “Me-too” wall that derailed my career, because times were extremely different ten years ago, and I’d just lost a baby among other things. All of that is a much longer story for another day, but all this is to portray that everything I sought after and worked hard for professionally was being snatched away from me. I was depressed, defeated, and in a very dark head space. I felt like I’d done everything I was supposed to and was being unfairly punished.

When I finally listened to the little voice inside of me (The Spirit) and started writing, things changed, and I finally felt like I was doing what I was meant to do. That feeling of being unfairly punished dissipated and I realized I was simply being pruned and redirected. Did I absolutely suck at writing when I finally did start? Yes. Did I basically have to put myself through author “school” via endless online research and exhausting trial and error tactics for years? Also yes. Did I eventually shelve my first book because it sucked? Yes. But I also learned SO MUCH from that book on what to do/what not to do and it very much launched me into a different career path I finally felt prepared to take on.

Looking back on my childhood now, I see that I’ve always loved telling stories. I’ve always been obsessed with movies (I mean, really obsessed–to the point of filming and writing them and making my friends act them out with me) and even though my love for reading came later (in my twenties) I’d loved the arts in many other ways for years (baton, dance, singing, acting). And what I most enjoyed about my many years of choreographing and performing was the story I could tell through the lyrics, rhythm, and choreography.

I also remember my mystery obsessions growing (Scooby-Doo, Nancy Drew, Alfred Hitchcock films, Christopher Nolan films) and realize why I ended up writing suspense and psychological thrillers with a meaningful twist.

So, if you know me and think it’s random that I’m now writing books, it’s not. The Lord has been preparing me to do so for a long time…I just didn’t know it.

-Audra

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